A Step Away from Social Services?

No, not really, but...

I went to pick Connor up from my parents' today and he wanted to show me something "SO COOL!"

"Look Mom, it's my coffin!" (he says beaming with pride)

"WTF?" (I silently think)

Ever since Halloween Connor has been obsessed with Dracula and Frankenstein. They don't scare him; he'll tell you they are "really cool pretend monsters, but don't be scared, they're not real." Connor wears a cape. Daily. So, it's really interesting when we're out in public and someone says, "Oh, a superhero! I've never met a real, live superhero before!" Connor then gives a look that implies "you idiot" (yes, he gets that look from me) and says "I'M DRACULA!" puts his arm up and covers half his face with his arm and cape, just as Dracula does...to which sweet old ladies in the grocery store are probably silently thinking to themselves "WTF?"

It was a cold afternoon full of indoor play, so my mom and Connor decided their craft today would be to create a Dracula coffin. We have a big cardboard box, complete with coffin shaped opening, a pull tab on the inside lid, and a pillow inside. I can just hear Connor now..."I"M DRACULA and I sleep in a real coffin at home, on my floor."

It's bad enough I cannot get my house cleaned, cannot seem to break through the chaos, and now, we have a coffin in the house, that Connor wants to sleep in each night, with his cape. I just imagine Connor sharing his coffin story, or the fact that he likes to crawl into the dog crate, with some stranger in the grocery store and the calls to Social Services flooding in. As I tell Connor's preschool teachers: I won't believe everything he says about you, if you won't believe everything he says about me.

Out of the Mouth...

"Hey Connor, we are going to Disney World soon! Are you excited?"

"YEAH! Will I see Uncle Rudy?"

"Yes, we'll see Uncle Rudy."

"Will I see Uncle Mitchell?"

"No, Mitchell lives in Charlotte now."

"Charlotte's web? Mitchell moved to Charlotte's web?"

Homemade Granite Cleaner

I'm all about saving some $ and getting our kitchen granite clean, disinfected, and streak-free. Since it's black, it really shows any streaks. It reminds me of when you'd spill liquid on your lab table in biology class and as much as you'd wipe and wipe, it just wasn't coming up, leaving streaks everywhere. The Method granite cleaner is $6 for a little bottle which is gone in about 2 weeks. I decided to experiment and here's a recipe I found. I checked online and the alcohol is safe on granite, plus it disinfects.

1/2 c. rubbing alcohol
5-6 drops dish detergent
1/4 c. water

Mix it up in a spray bottle and for pennies you have a great granite or countertop cleaner. I've also been using it as I clean out the fridge. It does have an alcohol smell to it, but it works great, so I can't complain.

Out of the Mouth of Babes

#1
"Mom, I get confused with God and Jesus. Is Jesus God's last name?"

#2
We were reading a story tonight about heroes.
"Who is your hero Connor?"
"God!"

3:03am

Yes, I am blogging when I should be sleeping. Connor's school Christmas photo is today and I couldn't find his plaid shirt I wanted him to wear, so I asked Mark to look. I put Connor to bed, but fell asleep with him, at 8pm, which means...

• I didn't find the shirt, and neither did Mark
• I didn't finish editing my designs at work
• I didn't get anything cleaned up

I know I only have one child, but I am feeling overwhelmed. The house is a MESS, I cannot seem to find the time or energy to get it cleaned and keep it that way, so we are in a constant state of CHAOS and "where is...?" is a constant question around here. UGH!

SCORE!

I'm a big bargain hunter, but I hate shopping. For Christmas this year we wanted to get Connor a playhouse, and I found a cute one by Step 2, but I was concerned that it's $300, another $150 in shipping b/c the stores don't carry it, and it's only 48 inches high. My mom and I ran to Toys R Us Saturday morning and found quite a bargain:

Meet the Savannah playhouse. It was 50% off, plus I had a coupon for another $10 off, and yet another coupon for another $10 gift card. WOO-HOO! For under $240 total, I got this one, which is Connor's big gift from Santa this year. My dad looked it over and said you couldn't even buy all the wood and accessories for $240 or less, so it was a great deal, plus it's over twice the size of the Step 2 playhouse, will grow with Connor, and can be used as a garden shed when he's done with it. And we got the last one in stock at the store...serendipity! Now, the box says "easy assembly"...

Out of the Mouths of Babes

"Connor! What do you have shoved in your ears?"

"HUH?"

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE SHOVED IN YOUR EARS??? IS THAT CHALK???!!!"

"No Mom, I'm Frankenstein and those are my bolts!"

Ah, well,... that explains the small blue pieces of chalk barely sticking out of the kid's ears.

You've Got to Find the Humor

So, work is CRAZY, I'm stressed out 100% of the time, and lucky me, today was my annual at my OB/GYN's office. Now here is where I just need to find humor in the situation...

My doctor is the same one who delivered Connor and is overall an amazing and compassionate woman. She travels to Africa to provide volunteer medical care and the people she meets there have a special place in her heart. You can tell from being in her office that these experiences have had a profound impact on her...there are necklaces for sale in the lobby, made by African women, with all money going to an AIDS charity, photos of her journey hung around the office, and so forth.

One photo, actually the positioning of it, I found HILARIOUS! So I'm sitting on the table in the exam room, looking around while I wait, and one of her Africa photos is on the wall across from the exam table, posted at eye level. I started to laugh...HYSTERICALLY!!!

The photo is composed of approximately 10 plus male teens, and it appears that they are all looking slightly downward at something. The angle of the photograph and its position on the wall directly across from the foot end of the exam table all combine to appear that you have a very captive audience during your exam.

Halloween...and what time is it REALLY?

Argh! It's Cannonball Connor!

Mark and his little pirate.

Ready to trick-or-treat!

The really cool thing about living in the neighborhood you grew up in is to see your child take part in activities and traditions that you were involved in as a kid. We have an annual Halloween parade and Connor now participates, and I love that it starts in front of our home. Even better, seeing friends I grew up with in the neighborhood returning with their kiddos and joining in the fun. I saw so many friends from school, and they made the mistake of talking me into joining Facebook. I've been addicted since joining late Friday night. I digress...

Connor had a good Halloween. Here's how we've progressed:

2005: Dressed as a pumpkin, too little for candy

2006: Dressed as a shark, too little for candy

2007: Dressed as a shark again (he begged to), went trick-or-treating, more interested in looking into our neighbors' homes than in candy. Candy, what's candy? My mommy doesn't let me eat that.

2008: Dread Pirate Cannonball Connor. CANDY! OMG Mom, you go to peoples' homes and THEY JUST GIVE YOU CANDY!!!

Now, what to do with all of this crap? So much for the weight I've been losing...already screwed that up with some Reese's. My MAJOR annoyance with Friday night was that our gym was still continuing with swim lessons- no refunds and no make-ups. What kind of idiots expect kids ages 2-9 are going to show up for a swim lesson on Halloween night??? Swindlers!

And I know the time change is only an hour, but I am completely thrown off and headed to bed.